Ask any pastor, and he or she will confirm that toxic parishes exist. He or she may well have served one at some point. To be fair, there are certainly toxic pastors out there as well, though it tends to be easier to address that problem than it is to deal with toxic parishes.
What is a toxic parish? I define it as a parish that is so embroiled in conflict and unwilling to make the changes necessary to move toward health that it actively sabotages or passively resists all attempts to engage in meaningful ministry.
Of course, there are varying degrees of toxicity, and in some situations the right pastor can transform a conflicted, dying congregation into a vibrant community of faith. Is there a point, though, at which denominations should simply refuse to send another pastor to a parish with a long history of chewing up and spitting out its pastors? Does the denomination have any responsibility to forewarn pastors about a parish’s history of conflict, or to provide financial or emotional support to pastors who are forced to leave dysfunctional congregations?
One vicar in England thinks it does, and he is suing his diocese for not exercising its “duty of care.” You can read more about it by clicking here.
What do you think? Please add your comments below.
One of the responsibilities of pastors serving congregations is to visit members who are hospitalized, home-bound, grieving the deaths of loved ones, or otherwise in need of pastoral care. What happens when the pastor is the one in need of care, though?
While parishioners can certainly visit and pray with their pastor, this role reversal can be awkward for both. Furthermore, the pastor’s role as leader of the congregation makes it inappropriate to share too much information about his or her personal struggles, just as it would be inappropriate for a counselor to do so with a client. Finally, in most denominations lay people cannot provide the sacrament of Holy Communion.
Who does provide pastoral care to hurting pastors? In theory, the bishop is supposed to be a pastor to the pastors; in reality, the bishop has so many other responsibilities that there is rarely enough time to do so. In addition, the bishop is often unaware of those needs; there are too many pastors for him or her to keep track of what is happening in every pastor’s life at any given time. Last but not least, because bishops are also the ones who recommend pastors for future calls and discipline those guilty of misconduct, pastors are unlikely to seek care from their bishops in some situations. Would you go to your boss for personal counseling?
The reality is that all too often, when pastors need a pastor, that need goes unmet. Sometimes, other clergy in the area provide pastoral care to their colleagues, but pastors are often reluctant to acknowledge their need for such care, even to themselves, much less seek out someone who could provide it.
There are no easy answers, but acknowledging the problem is the first step in solving it. If you are a pastor, who do you turn to when you need pastoral care? What suggestions do you have for bishops and others within the church who want to help hurting pastors? Please share your comments here and invite others to do the same.